There was a time in my life when I was feeling worthless and unloved. I hired a prostitute solely to tell me that I’m a hunk and that she loved me.

That was fiction. Of what value could there be in flattery and declarations of affection that were bought?

Early in Donald Trump’s first term as President, in a Cabinet meeting, Trump directed the Cabinet members seated around the table to praise him, which they did with great enthusiasm. The press interpreted the incident as evidence that Trump values loyalty above all. I disagree. I believe that Trump craves praise and approval above all.

The authoritarians

What do Stalin, Hitler, Mao, Franco, and Pol Pot have in common? Besides being men, there are two commonalities: they all were oppressive authoritarian rulers of their countries, and they all had fathers who were described as cold, distant, authoritarian, emotionally abusive, and often physically abusive. The sons of these cold, abusive fathers scare, scowl, and emanate threat, but just want Daddy’s approval.

Hurt people

Hurt people hurt people
—Charles Eads (repeated without attribution by others)

As I write this, Elon Musk is in charge of gutting U.S. federal services that help the most vulnerable, while being supported wholeheartedly (an oxymoron) by President Trump. What do Musk and Trump have in common? The same sort of relationship with their fathers as did the above cruel authoritarian leaders.

Burn the ships

The tactic to “burn the ships,” which ensures there’s no way to retreat—moving forward is the only way to survive—may have been used by Alexander the Great, and later, famously by Hernán Cortés in 1519 to motivate his men to conquer the Aztecs in Mexico. The strategy being used by Elon Musk in service of the Trump administration is to apply burn the ships to the federal government: gut or eliminate the institutions that have maintained the U.S. as a democracy over time.

Burn the ships is not just a tactic to destroy the means to return to a previous geographical home. It’s also a way to burn the past, the past humiliation from an abusive father, and in Trump’s case, the past humiliation of losing an election and being tried and convicted of numerous felonies. What better way to leave behind all your shames than to burn the ships? Since I can’t get your approval, I will burn the past of when I was demeaned.

In addition to the above, Trump and Musk have scuttled trade and defense alliances and dropped the guillotine on the entire U.S. electorate: your head goes one way, your body goes the other—you’re all fucked.

Those who voted in Trump and his proxy, Musk, wittingly or unwittingly voted to burn the ships.

When I wrote about the metaverse, I contended that Mark Zuckerberg’s motivation was to level the playing field, that is, the social field where his and those of his fellow techbros' impoverished social skills could be hidden behind cartoon figures. Trump is also leveling the playing field to hide his impoverished personality. He’s good at only war: business as war, elections as war, all relations as war, but it’s war for cowards who play tough guys in front of the bathroom mirror as Robert De Niro’s character did in Taxi Driver: “You talking to me?”

The in-group for these boys wearing Daddy’s too-big suit is celebrity, external validation, and control. Their out-group is all the sources of their inferiority they fantasize they’ve left behind.

As Russian despot Vladimir Putin sacrifices the lives of his countrymen in attempts to annex Ukraine, Trump is making threats to annex Canada, the Panama Canal, and Greenland. Trump’s bizarre threats can be explained as Putin is the one daddy from whom Trump wishes to gain approval.